I slept better last night. Sam’s sleepover appears to have gone well. Marc and I got up and went to breakfast it was really nice to get out and spend some time together. We agreed that we need to do this more often.
We come home and Marc makes a huge list of things he wants to do. I get this about him this is how I’m wired as well except I’m unable to do things at the moment. This whole list building and need to accomplish gives us a false sense of control. I’m sure he needs to feel some control at the moment.
The usual thing happens his stress levels go up with the mounting pressure to accomplish and I’m trying not to be affected by this. I’m trying the opposite – to let go…..
Interesting how we are on such different pathways. He continues with his list and I help where I can which is not much. We make a yummy dinner and watch a movie with Sam. My pain levels have been very strong tonight I feel like I have this tight metal band around my chest. It’s hard to take a deep breath and I’m getting nerve pain. I’m telling myself that the nerve pain means healing.
If I knew this procedure was going to be so painful I wonder if I would have done something different. I guess we’ll never know.
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