dignity 2Saturday the 30th November 2013

I get to go home today! That’s quick huh? I thought so. I haven’t seen anyone yet about my prosthesis so I am waiting eagerly for them to come and fit me out.

No one comes and I eventually ask the nurse, “So when to I get my prosthesis? “ She looks at me like I am dumb and says, “You’re not, it’s Saturday they don’t work on Saturday!” Again I am dumbfounded, you could have pushed me over with a feather except I am in bed.

I am so shocked and upset I don’t even argue I just become so overwhelmed at the injustice of it. How dare they promise me a support then not get it to me because of a day of the week, I mean how hard is it?

I am about to be released into the world looking like a one boobed freak and I can’t do anything about it. There is something about a woman with one breast, it is extremely noticeable, I mean I am a D cup so it looks ridiculous, and that’s not even that big.

Marc arrived with his biggest warmest smile on ready to take me home when he sees my face. He asks “what is wrong?” and I explain, he is so supportive and says “no one will notice babe.” But that’s not the point, I don’t feel comfortable, that’s the point, this is about me and how I feel.  “I notice!”

I realise after a few tears that this needs to stop because nothing is going to change. So I get my brave on and decide to hold a flower arrangement strategically where my boob used to be. PERFECT!!

This is not the last of this though, I wonder how many other women have been sent home like me? I am sure I am not the only one, this has to stop, even if I have to change it myself. Surely it is not that hard to send a woman home with dignity?

So I walk down to the car, very gingerly, I am very sore and it is amazing how much the jarring motion of walking sends shock waves through my weirdly unbalanced chest.   Am also sent home with a drain in my chest. This should be in place for perhaps 2 weeks and then will be able to come out. It is to prevent a seroma or fluid build up at the surgical site.  So I have a bag that sits permanently on my shoulder holding the drain that comes form my chest.  I look like I spend a bit of time at the library.

So home sweet home here we come, minus my boob :(